Train Travel floored

I write this sat in a hotel connected to a garage in the middle of nowhere the hotel has wifi but charges a whopping £5 for one hours access – which I refuse to pay.I am in the middle of nowhere a £8 taxi journey away from Didcot train station, I am here unpaid on a course for the job I am doing at university this year.

To get here I got a volunteer to drive me to Fareham station where I met a support worker and got on a train to Southampton from there we got on another train headed for Oxford, we had to get off at Reading station and change trains again to get to Didcot.

All was going well until we reached our second train, upon boarding it became apparent that the train was hideously in accessible. We asked where the wheelchair area was assuming there would be more space, on getting there we discovered that it was literally an empty space with a small table off to one side.

The train was rather busy and full of older people, who where insistent on sitting down first and finding there reserved sears.

This created a battle field incorporating train staff, my support worker, me Gus and a million grumpy old farts that where fully prepared to pushed there way forward not caring who they ran over with there suitcases or stepped on.

My support worker put her bag down on a chair closest to the wheelchair bay only to turn around and discover a woman had picked it  up and was about to move it somewhere else. There was carnage in the carriage, people and bags everywhere refusing to move to let other people past because there booked seat was that way and they wanted to sit in it now.

The train was delayed by 6 minutes whilst the gridlock continued with train staff and other passengers shouting at large amounts of old farts to move out of the way and let other people such as myself past.

Eventually after much shuffling and complete disregard to other people the large groups of old farts sat down.

Then I discovered that the wheelchair seat had no seats around it, basically there would be space for Gus but not for me. None of the seats around it had any room for Gus to lay under them so what was I supposed to do?

In the end I sat in the wheelchair space on the floor for over an hour and a half, I spent this time having poor Gus being stepped on even after I had warned people that he was there, I was also stepped on, people tried to block us both into the space with bags and even tried to wheel them on top of us.

I remain utterly disgusted by this, I was basically a piece of luggage, one particular old fart of a commuter stepped on Gus  after I had already warned her that he was there, I pointed this out to her and then she patted me on the head and apologised, I was fuming!

Then the guard came through the train and I asked him a question he turned around and answered talking to my support worker instead of to me, referring to me as she and stating that they have special assistance “for people like her”.

I snapped I told him to talk to me not about me I was on the verge of rude but I had had enough by that point.

I have never had a train journey that bad, I am honestly appalled by it I have heard horror stories from other disabled people that have had horrific train journeys, but I have always felt positive about travel by train and enjoyed it as a largely stress free experiences, but now the tables have turned, my journey was utterly horrific thanks to the train company for not training its staff as to how to talk to disabled people, not making there trains accessible and the other passengers being horrible old farts who only cared about themselves with no consideration for others – I hate people that are so selfish!

Snow Leapord – What The Media Have Forgotton To Tell

Apple – Mac OS X – Accessibility.

Snow Leopard the latest update to the popular Leopard operating system installed on all modern day Mac computers has got an update, it’s only a little one and mainly focuses around bug fixes, it’s not a complete overhaul of the way the system looks but at less than £30 you would not expect a miracle.

Opinion as I have understood it has been divided, many see snow Leopard as a bit of a waste of money and time, its well documented how it is faster than Leopard (which I have never found slow).

There are a collection of features that have not been spoken about in the public eye that I have seen in any way and that is the updates to the already good accessibility tools.

To put this into context most of the time I use something called Text- To -Speech or more commonly referred to in is easier form of TTS or a Screen Reader. For Mac this is something called Voiceover. Basically a lovely little American man called Alex reads me everything that happens on screen, all the things I would struggle to read. I navigate through different windows and applications with ease and am able to for the majority of my time edit the two websites and one forum which I own and manage solely using this software.

Its hard to explain to a person that has never used TTS but when Apple created Voiceover they took the manual on making TTS engines and threw it off  a plane before passing it through a mulching machine and stamping on its mussy remains. Voiceover is unique anyone can use it straight out of the box, no additional software needed.

A blind person can go along to an Apple store and say ‘I would like a MacBook please’, pay for it  return home open the box and use it straight off. Apple are the only computer and software developer to do this, they are incredibly committed to accessiblity and see there products as the way forward, even the iPhone3G S now has Voiceover and can be used by visually impaired people.

With the Microsoft  counterparts we all know and… hate that is simply not possible, you would have to purchase your laptop then spend an additional £800 on software to make it accessible and then install the software.

Snow Leopard is once again revolutionising the way that blind and partially sighted people use their computers TTS engines have forever relied on the keyboard to allow users to navigate their way around their computer, this is no more.

With Voiceover and Snow Leopard OS X 10.6 users can now not only navigate with the keyboard but also with the touch pad on MacBook’s using gestures. Now that for many people may well be the closest they ever get to using a computer mouse, something that if you have severe visual impairment you are seriously unlikely to ever do!  Voiceover is more powerful and better at handling complex web pages with the new release which will be very welcomed by many as there are certain web pages that Voiceover currently just does not have the power to understand.  For example the webpage I am writing this on right now, Voiceover cannot cope with all the information and the styling of WordPress, which is as much down to the design faults of wordpress as it is to the lack of Voiceover grunt. With increased power I hope that Voiceover will overcome the WordPress accessibility issues, but time will tell.

I must now buy Snow Leopard and quickly.

Alas I am not the only person jumping up and down giggling with technology fuelled excitement whilst drooling slightly at apples accessibility my freelancer friend Lesley Smith has decided to convert to the ways of apple, mostly because of the accessibility features I have just mentioned and a fair amount of persuading from me.

BBC NEWS | Wales | Parking dispute blind man arrest

BBC NEWS | Wales | Parking dispute blind man arrest.

This is what blind people face every time they leave there front doors, drivers parking on pavements, people leaving there bikes on the pavement, overhanging branches, roadwork’s, and street furniture not to mention other pedestrians and road users.

The sad thing is this is a common story all over the country, I have had the same problem near my parents house and even worse in Southampton, it put the safety of guide dog owners at risk and threatens our independence.

It also causes problems for people with pushchairs and wheelchair users.

Car drivers please don’t park on the pavement.

The slug chronicles

Now think about this have you ever stepped on a slug? The answer is probably yes, but then have you stepped on a slug whilst wearing nothing but socks and whilst carrying 30Kg of guide dog? I thought not!

This was the scene last Monday night, Ian my mums 9 year old guide dog had just had a big operation on his mouth, he had been allowed home but was very, very sleepy. He had not been to the toilet (of any variety) for about 10 hours -based on this we were sure he needed to go.

His legs however would not carry him, he was like a very, very drunk old man he got a few paces and then simply collapsed.

Slowly with a lot of my help we were edging towards the back door.

There are however 3 steps to negotiate before making it onto the grass area, I had to make a call I was concerned he would not make it down the steps without landing on his face.

That was it then I had to carry him.

Now lets have a little reality check here, this is me Jemma Brown  -  the girl who can’t see a thing in the dark and who does not posses any balance, carrying 30Kg of dog down some steps in the dark!

Well I did and Ian and I both survived… just!

It was almost close for a moment, as I took the last step onto the grass still carrying Ian I stepped on a slug and my foot slipped forward under the slimy mess I had just created.

Luckily it did not slide far but it left me with dead slug entrails the entire length of my sock.

My socks has now gone to the landfill heaven in the ground.

There is a moral to this story, if you are a little on the blind side and ever have the need to carry your guide dog or as in this case someone else’s guide dog outside apply shoes first!

BBC – Ouch! (disability) – Opinion – Disability Bitch – The ultimate Disability Bitch

BBC – Ouch! (disability) – Opinion – Disability Bitch – The ultimate Disability Bitch.

(One hell of a block quote coming up!)

The ultimate Disability Bitch

20th August 2009

Readers, I know I’ve said some unkind things over the years. I know I’m not always right. Actually that’s not true, I am always right. What I mean to say is I know that some people disagree with me, some of the time. They are idiots, obviously, but it does happen. What I’m struggling to say is that I feel I’ve been quite restrained over the years. There are many things I could’ve said that I didn’t, for fear of offending the nation. But today that’s all about to change.

The main thing, the real biggie, the important observation of all important observations, the one that I’ve deliberately held back on all these years is … and I’m sorry, readers, but I just can’t keep it in anymore. I’ve had enough. Hold onto your hats. I. HATE. NORMAL. PEOPLE!

There. I’ve said it. And it had to be said. You want me to explain myself now I suppose? OK. Well, it’s just, I’ve been on holiday for a fortnight now and I’ve had to watch the Normals parade up and down the beach, exposing their disappointingly monotonous flesh from tip of perfectly proportioned toe to the exquisitely coiffed hair on their textbook lovely heads, untroubled by imperfect mental health, functioning as human beings without the aid of seven different daily medications, and skipping along the sand without mobility aids like it doesn’t even require any effort.

Readers, I tell you what: if I didn’t hate them, I’d pity them.

Imagine how boring it must be, to wake up every morning knowing you’re probably not going to fall over, risk death by attempting to board a train in rush hour or play Russian roulette with your very life by forgetting whether or not you’ve taken your tablets at lunchtime. You have to feel sorry for them. No wonder they park in blue badge spaces without permission and use disabled toilets even when they’re not actually disabled. It’s the only excitement they get in their tiny little normalised lives: the thrill of seeing how long they can get away with occupying a ‘handicap area’ illegally before some junior authority figure has a stiff word with them. It’s the only thrill they get! Poor souls!

Don’t feel too sorry for them, though. There is one very specific reason why I hate the lot of them. It’s this: they all think we want to be like them. The sad, deluded chancers.

Seriously, here’s an example: The other day I was at a big party. And because it was a big party, I was using my most fashionable walking stick, co-ordinated perfectly with my drop-dead gorgeous outfit. This had not gone unnoticed: I was working the room.

Soon, a disappointingly dreary non-disabled stranger was making her way toward me. Of course she was. I am uber-cool.

“Disability Bitch?” she said. “You’re the Disability Bitch, aren’t you? I’m very sorry you have to use it, but that is a beautiful walking stick.”

Two things: first, of course it is a beautiful walking stick. Do you think I, Disability Bitch, would make my way to a massive festive gathering with anything other than a beautiful walking stick? Why are you surprised? Clearly you are of the belief all cripples are legally obliged to carry around ugly NHS issue grey plastic disability aids. That, you dear, sweet, naive little able bodied random party guest, is because you have probably only ever seen photographs of disabled people looking pathetic on charity advertising hoarding , and never actually met a disabled person in real life.

Let me try to find an equivalent situation you’d understand. Ah yes: It would be rather like me presuming all non-disableds look like the girl off the Wonderbra ad. They don’t. They are just trying to sell you something. You gullible idiot.

Second, why the hell are you, a tediously normal person who I have only just met this minute, feeling sorry that I have to use a stick? What business is it of yours how I choose to accessorise myself? You know nothing of my life, and yet you suppose it is a disappointment to me that I have to use a mobility aid, even while acknowledging that my mobility aid is one of the most gorgeous objects you have ever seen in your entire life.

Basically, you tiresome specimen of humdrum normality, you are assuming that your life is better than mine simply because I am disabled and you are not. How arrogant is that!

Give me one good solid reason why your life is better than mine. I bet you even have to pay full price to use public transport and sometimes have to stand up on buses. Yeah? I don’t. See! I win!

Oh dear. I did warn you I was especially cantankerous this week. I know. Every self-respecting cripple thinks these things in the privacy of their own head, but now I’ve gone and said them out loud.
I realise I may have single-handedly set the cause of disability rights back about twenty years. After all, it is the twenty first century, right, and we’re all supposed to be holding hands together now – those of us who have hands. We should apparently be joining forces and working together, disabled and non-disabled alike. Yawn. Do I look like I care?

If you want to be friends with non-disabled people, readers, that’s fine. Campaign for your own disability rights. Me, I’m going to be sitting here in my own little ghetto, minding my own business. I never wanted to be normal anyway.

The reason for such a large block quote, she may have not said it in the most dyplomatic way (its Disability Bitch, what where you expecting) but she is so 100% definatly right!

I hate it when ‘normals’  feel sorry for me or even worse fill me up with words such as ‘brave’ (my own personal most hated word) and inspirational.

BBC NEWS | Health | Moderate drinking ‘boosts bones’

BBC NEWS | Health | Moderate drinking ‘boosts bones’.

Thats a even better reason to go for a pint! Horray!

I don’t actually like most forms of beer but now I am sure I can test them all out!

I’ve been in Switzerland don’t you know?

you had probably noticed that the blog has been a little quiet of late, it’s ok I’m not dead I have been on my travels again!

More specifically I went to Switzerland staying in Adleboden in the Bernease Oberland for ten days as a guidew leader, it is quite honestly the most beautiful place I have ever seen (ok thats probably not saying much for a blindie but everyone else thought the same) I went from being in a snow-storm-compleate-white-out-blizzard to sitting by the pool in 30℃ sunshine in under 24hours.

BBC NEWS | Health | ‘No shows’ cost the NHS millions

BBC NEWS | Health | ‘No shows’ cost the NHS millions.

I had to write about this purely because I have had a very bad experience or two.

For example I once received an eye appointment for the same day at two o’clock, three o’clock and four o’clock they all arrived in the post on the same day in three separate envelopes, I had to phone up to try and establish what the hell was going on.

Another time I got sent an appointment at 9 am on a Saturday morning and another one for the Tuesday only a few days later both in the same envelope, I phoned (again) to check this was correct and was told that yes it was right. I turned up on the Saturday and know one could quite work out why I was there, my consultant was not even in and the doctor actually apologised for the ‘error’ even though it was not her fault!

Then there is the local podiatry service who ring me up less than 30 minutes before my appointment to cancel it, when I am already sat on the bus on my way, they have done this twice now.

Oh and then there is the time said podiatry administrator rang me when I was in town to tell me about a change in my appointment, with bags of food shopping, heavy rucksack, guide dog, wearing my non-prescription sunglasses and balancing the phone on my shoulder. She babbled possible appoinment times at me I said I did not have my diary out or a pen so I did not know when I was free and could not write it down.  She said I had to pick one,I said any.

She read the time and day out again  and I said could you email me that please, she said no.

I asked if  she could send me a letter in large print, she said no.

I asked if I could have a letter in standard print, she said no.

I asked if she could phone me back in 30 minutes she said no.

I asked if she could phone me back straight away and leave me a voice mail with the info, she said no, (abruptly).

I pointed out once again that I could not write it down, due to the fact that in those moments stood there in the sun I was blind, she said I should write it down told me when it was one more time and hung up!

Unfortunately this is just a brief outline of the experiences I have had in Southampton when trying to sort out hospital/doctors appointments, I have spent over a year attempting to get my appointments from the eye unit sent to me in large print without success, it’s the EYE UNIT!

Don’t get me wrong I think the NHS is great heck I get enough out of it, but my point is that it is no wonder people miss appoinmtnents with administration systems like the ones near me!

BBC NEWS | Pakistan blind cricketers denied UK visa

BBC NEWS | World | South Asia | Pakistan blind cricketers denied UK visa.

We are supposed to be holding the next blind cricket world cup, how can we if we are not going to let the other teams into the country?

How awful, disgusting and wrong. If it was the Pakistan football team they would be allowed in no problem!

My very own Top Ten

Regular followers of the stuff on Ouch! will know all about there series of Top Ten’s of disability loves, hates and everything inbetween. Well alas dear readers I have created my own and here it is for your pleasure:

Top ten things blind people hate:

1. Snow (blind mans fog don’t you know)
2. Subtitled films.
3. Shared surfaces.
4. All car drivers.
5. Silent theatre.
6. Randomly positioned priority seats.
7. Loose toddler’s
8. Chewing gum on the pavement
9. Dog poo
10. ‘Mind your head’ signs