Well readers as you may well be aware I have, simply for ease of understanding labeled myself as a blindie for some time. When you refer to yourself as a blinky most people of a certain age think you are talking about a cartoon koala bear not describing your visual impairment as partially sighted. So blindie has worked to convey that sense of hey I’m visually impaired it’s not a taboo subject and I am comfortable to talk and even joke about it.
I have been partially sighted since the day I was born, well I was actually born with very little sight at all but after some fantastic surgeons working there magic on my tiny peepers all I have ever known is partially sighted.
Growing up it has been drummed into me, quite rightly by various medical professionals, my parents, teachers and sometimes even friends that I have to be careful about a bang on the head. This is because if I sustain a serious blow to the head I am at a higher risk than your average human being of detaching a retina at the back of either eye or worst case scenario both!
I never expected anything more than this, I am a realist and I am grateful for what I have. I also never really expected anything less for most of my life I thought everything was going to stay stable and be the same for ever. Oh how naive I was!
Last Monday I went for my appointment after I had the hemorrhage a few weeks ago. The very nice consultant, who incidentally reads my blog here (hello Mr N) confirmed that I have had a bleed and the general state of my eyes, especially the right one is not good.
We decided together that I could now be registered blind, before that moment I was partially sighted the way I had always been growing up and suddenly I had the new label of a blind person.
The thing is the more I think about it the more I realise that it is just a label but this is very difficult to comprehend.
A tiny part of me is devastated which I think is only natural but in reality the change of terms means almost nothing. I have not changed as a person my life is not going to change much if at all with this new label but it feels very strange.
I guess to sum up everything quite simply its a blow and a shock but it could be worse and it’s not the end of the world.
Positives will come out of it, I have the joy now as a person registered as blind to a half price TV license so one day when I have enough space and money to buy a TV I can look forward to paying less license fee!